Be.....nice

This is a simple lesson, really. Be nice. Be nice to the people around you. Be nice to yourself.

I spent a lot of today's easy run thinking about that. I am nice to most people most of the time. I am not saying that I am a ray of sunshine to everyone, but I try to give the benefit of the doubt to people and see the kindness in their gestures and actions. And when their gestures and actions are lacking, I try to not take it personally. We never know what people are going through unless we ask, and even then we may not be given the whole picture. So in these situations I am being nice by putting on a smile and sometimes taking the shit that is being flung at me. There is a lot I don't say under the premise of being nice.

Being nice to myself can be a struggle. I need to not compare myself to the Colleen of old. She isn't dead but things are different time. I have come to terms that I need to deal with my body and mind differently.

Being kind to myself requires a lot of effort and a change of mindset. I have learned to recognize the unhealthy patterns of thinking and deal with them head on. I have been wearing my fitbit to monitor my heart rate when I run but then it turned into being obsessed with step count and getting my 250 steps every hour, feeling bad if I didn't even though I ran for 12 km earlier. That's stupid, so I took it off and it is now in the drawer. That is the same reason why I don't track my food. My issues with food have been well documented and I cannot measure, weigh portion anything because it doesn't take much to get into the unhealthy and obsessive habits. So I don't. Instead I make healthy choices most of the time and remember that food is fuel. When I eat well, I run well and feel better. That's enough.

I also have to remember that missing a run or modifying one isn't being a failure, it is being smart and being kind to my body. Last summer when I ran a half marathon I missed the big picture that I was accomplishing something amazing instead I felt like I let myself down. The training for this half marathon is going ok, it's the hardest that I have ever worked for a half marathon. But it is becoming too much. With doing my practical hours I have spent more time on my feet than they're used to and I have to remember that that is actually hard on my body.

My goal this long weekend is to look at the remaining weeks of my training plan and adjust it so I am not running more than about 55km in a week. I am going to pare down some of the strength workouts and replace them with easy running. One thing that has been obvious to me is on the days that I do the easy runs I not only feel like I could run forever at that speed, but I don't feel like I am shattered for the rest of the day! I also think it would be prudent to have a day off of everything. No work or running. My rest day from running still involves at leat 2 spin classes. I am never actually resting.

Time to be fucking nice.

It is time

This is our cat Rogue. She is very personable. She likes to be where her people are and when they aren't home she likes to be near something that reminds her of them. I found her yesterday sleeping with her head on my running shoes. when I am home she is always close. In fact as I type this she is sleeping right beside me.

What is is time for? It is time to modify my training plan more. While I have been loving the increase in mileage and the milestones that I have achieved I don't think that keeping up that intensity is best for my body.

For example, yesterday's strength intervals was the following: 1.5 mile warm up, 6 x 1600m with 400m recovery, 1.5 mile cool down. Instead I did 2km warn up, 4 x 1600m with 400m recovery, 2 km cool down. So it was a but shorter than scheduled. but more manageable.

Today is a rest day from running. I still will teach 2 spin classes and do some strength.

I have some soft tissue in my feet that swell and I have received cortisone injections for them in the past. They are in between my third and fourth toes on both feet and my feet feel squishy when I walk. I don't know if it has been the increase of running or poor shoe quality but they have started forming again. I went to my GP to see if he could expedite the process for injections and he did! I have appointments for the end of the month; I don't have to wait for the rheumatologist to arrange them. My GP is absolutely amazing. I had to wait over 45 minutes past my appointment time to see him but I don't mind because of how thorough he is with me, and I assume is with all of his patients. I always leave with my questions answered and I am never feeling rushed to as him. I am very grateful for his care.

Listening to my body

Yesterday I took a rest day from running. Even though the sun was out I could not get excited about running. When I was teaching my class in the morning I had difficulty with my balance, and just felt overall tired.

It was a 10km easy run. I may or may not make it up depending on how I am feeling.

Week 10 summary.

 Summary of the week: Hanson's Plan vs what I actually did.

Monday easy 9.6km
9km done on the treadmill in an hour as this was all I had time for. Made sure I slowed down and tried to have relaxed cadence and stride.

Tuesday 4 x 1200m w/600m recovery
Went outside for this one. The repeats were done at the folowing paces  (/km): 5:13, 5:11, 5:10 and 5:08. I was very happy that I was able to run this fast and enjoyed having a finish line for this.

Wednesday rest or cross train
2 practical clients and 2 spin classes.

Thursday 6.4km race pace
Back to the treadmill as is was too windy to run this outside. Like last time, I slowed it down and alternated 2 speeds for 7km. This run is still the most mentally challenging for me. 10km total

Friday easy 8km
Done at a slower recovery pace. I find anything slower than 6:45/km feels hard on my joints, especially my knees. I am probably due for a massage.

Saturday 19.2 km long run

Because the 16km runs were taking me about 1:45 to do, I figured that 2 hours would be a good cut off for me. I managed 18.2km in 1:59 which I am happy with. However my left foot was getting soe and my toes were hurting. I think it is a combination on the Morton's Neuroma that is coming back as well as old shoes. Both pairs of shoes that I have been running the majority of my mileage each have over 750km on it.

Sunday easy 8km
Did easy 6km at recovery pace.

Total mileage this week is over 60km!

Every week I impress myself with my accomplishments. I am ho grateful for the ability to run this far. I am hoping I am doing my body good, because I feel mentally good.

As much as I am enjoying the training, I am looking forward to when the race is over and running will be less structured. I want to hit the river valley trails. Actually there is nothing stopping me from doing my easy runs there now except how muddy and icy and cold they will be. I am ready for warmer weather! Time to take all those colourful speed shorts outside.

Will I ever not be tired?

One thing I have felt with RA is always a low grade fatigue. It isn't to the point where I feel like I can't drag myself out of bed, but at about mid afternoon I always feel like I could use a nap. This happens even on days where I wake up feeling rested. Those days don't happen terribly often.

The Hanson's program builds on cumulative fatigue and in the program I am following one day is rest or cross train. For me that's the Wednesdays where I don't actually run but I still teach 2 spin classes, and soon to be a third in the morning. I think I need to take an actual day off of all activity, including teaching and rest my body.

Intervals done outside

 I staarted the week with an easy 9km treadmill run because that's all I had time for. The plan called for 9.6 but that's close enough. I also slowed it down from 6:30/km to 6:40.
 
Tuesday the weather was Colleen friendly so I took my interval runs outside. I ran around our local lake which is about a mile around and that was perfect for 4 x 1200m w/400m recovery. I actually shorted myself some recovery as the plan says 600m recovery. Whoops. However, I was able to run them all consistently, getting a couple of seconds faster every time, and also running them at a faster lace than the previous two interval workouts.What??? I guess being outside and having a finish line works for me, as well as slowing down the easy run. At the time they felt hard, and the last half of the last one I could start feeling my whole body getting tired, but I completed it without slowing down. Yay me!

Post race pace run high five

I find wind to be hard on my body so I took this week's race pace run to the treadmill. The plan was 4 miles but I took it up to 7km. Next week it is 8km on the schedule and I wanted a gradual increase. I am looking forward to challenging myself outside with this. I just didn't want to battle the wind. It's not race day. I am mentally strong on race day.

Look! My eyeball
I had an opthalmologist appointment yesterday for my biannual check up. Did you know RA can affect vision? Spoiler: it can fuck up everything!! Don't worry, everything is good with my eyes so far, and she says that I take excellent pictures, which you can see here.

did you also know I suck at blog formatting?

Week 9 summary

I know I am terrible at updating this blog. Not very inspirational I know. Oh well.

Another successful week of training done. Here is the comparison, but I have moved the Hanson's plan workouts to the same day where I did something similar.

Monday 5 x 1km intervals
I only did 4 of these as I was feeling tired. I was actually able to jog the in betweens. I know I didn't have another one in me so I quick while I was still slightly behind. I also teach a group fitness class in the morning and I find my legs are really tired from it.

Tuesday easy 5 miles
I also cut this one a bit short as my legs were still tired. I completed 6km instead of the 8. I also taught an extra class today so that was a bonus half hour cycle and 45 minutes on my feet.

Wednesday rest or cross train
Teaching 2 cycle classes and 2 training sessions adds up to a successful cross training day.

Thursday 4 miles goal pace
I was able to do this to completion, actually going slightly farther. Ok, 0.1km but it was still farther. I kept it closer to the 1:59 goal pace instead of the slightly faster which I found tiring a few weeks ago. I think this is starting to click

Friday easy 5 miles
Cut this short because I taught a bootcamp class this morning and honestly didn't have 2 more miles in me. 5km done.

Saturday 10 mile long run
Toughed this one out on the treadmill because we were getting a ton of snow and I didn't feel like trudging outside. Also, I had 5 pit stops in the first half so it was nice to have a bathroom 10 steps away. I did a run 9 walk 1 style to make sure that I drank enough fluid. Last week I had a hard time towards the end and maybe that was because of an electrolyte imbalance or dehydration. I ended up drinking 400mL NUUN during this run and felt good. I also ran the segments faster in the second half, but still kept it in the long run pace range.

Sunday easy 6 miles
I slowed this one down a bit and trudged through it.

Total mileage this week was 57km. A new high for me.

There is a lot of motivation out there: people saying that you should get your workouts done as written. And I agree with that. If ou want to achieve your goal, you need to do the work. Even thought I cut about 5 miles from the schedule this week, I still think I am doing ok with the volume of activity I do in other things. Ideally when people are run training according to this plan all you are supposed to do is run. If I were able to do that I would.

I don't know how much the running is exacerbating this, but the Morton's Neuroma I get on my left foot is returning and I am starting to feel it when I run. My orthotics feel off and the top of my foot feels hot. I have made an appointment to see my doctor to start the ball rolling to get a cortisone injection.

Week 8 summary

I finished this week with a 16km long run on Saturday and a 9km easy run on Sunday, both outside, and the first time outside in our winter here for 2 months. It was sunny and this fair weather runner gave it a thumbs up!

It is much harder to run outside in non ideal weather conditions than on my treadmill, but I did like going somewhere. I was overdressed on Saturday and sweat a lot, and my thighs ended up cramping the last couple of km which brought my overall pace down.

But looking at the past few weeks the consistency has been there, even the last 2 weeks at the same overall distance and being 6 seconds apart. I couldn't have even tried to plan that precision.

This training is making me feel tired though. With school etc I feel like I have a lot to balance and even though I just came back from a me trip less than a month ago, I am already looking forward to the next one in May.

Tempo Thursday

HHM: 1.5 mile warm up, 4 miles @half pace, 1.5 miles cool down, 11.2km total

Me: 2 km warm up, 6km half pace, 1 km cooldown 9km total

I had a great run today for a number of reasons, or maybe none of the following:

1. A great night's sleep. I logged over 8 hours of snoozing!

2. I huge supper. I had a big plateful of gluten free pasta and half a chicken breast.

3. I started my run about 9am, which is hours earlier than the afternoon runs I have been doing. I find my brain is sharpest in the morning, so I need to do school work then while I can still think clearly.

4. I slowed down. My previous race pace runs have been about 5:32/km. I slowed this to a 5:38. The five seconds don't seem like a lot on paper, but they really helped. Also 5:38/km is closer to what a true 2 hour half pace is, 5:41. I don't need to try to train for the faster result. 

This morning my feet do feel tender. I have the plan to call the doctor that did the cortisone injections in my feet to see if she will do them for me. I don't want to have to go through my rheum.

Tuesday intervals

I do love running fast and I do llove when fast training pays off in the end. I am getting a bit tired of the treadmill for speed though, because I like running towards something rather than follwing a cursor around the track.

I realize now I should have been listing what the plan says vs what I actually did.so today:

HHM: 1.5 mile warm up, 6 x 800m (5-10k pace) w/ 400m rec, 1.5 mile cool down 12 km total
Modificaton: 1.5 mile warm up, 6 x 800m (ave 5:13/km) w/400m rec, 1 mile cool down 11km total

Slightly shorter because like ever speed session I just want the workout done and I'm usually tired, so the cool down gets cut. Also, I wore new shoes yesterday and I think there is too much cushioning in them and my feet really started to hurt the last 15 minutes or so.

The post workout glow of actually surviving!

Being all bendy.

I had some thoughts about the plan as a whole that I posted on an online journal:

I trust the training and I really want to give it my best shot. I fully think I am capable of a sub 2 half. I look at my training the last time I achieved it, and I thought I trained hard for it but this is much harder. I know I have to stay ahead of the fatigue and the possible extra inflammation I may be afflicting on my body. For example, I did 4 x 1.6km as my toughest interval workout last time and my weekly mileage the last 6 weeks was in the 45-55km range. I'm sure that is enough. I don't think I need to run 6 x 1.6km and 2 x 4.8km in addition to a 6-10km tempo in the same week. I'm already in that 45-55km range.

But that devil on my shoulder wants me to follow the plan....

The angel knows I need to have a hard look at it and do the modifications to it now, so when it pops up on my calendar it's already done, in stone, and "officially" the plan.

Week 7 summary

Last week was another week above 50km for me!! 53.1km in addition to 1:30 of spin classes and teaching my regular older adult class Monday plus 3 additional classes. Yesterday my legs were toast!

Monday easy 6.4km
Tuesday 8 x 600m with 400m recovery 11 km total
Wednesday no running
Thursday 7.5km with 5k at race pace
Friday easy 7.2
Saturday long 16km
Sunday easy 5km

The race pace runs are going to be my most challenging. I need to find a way to stay competitive with myself. I don't seem to have an issue during a race!